Mother’s Day: How to cope with losing your mother

Mother’s Day is observed each year on May 8, and honours mothers. While it is a day marked by gratitude, for some who have lost their mothers, this day brings a lot of bad memories. 

Here are some of the best ways to cope with losing one’s mother. 

Suppression of memories or sorrow is unhealthy

Repress, run, and rationalize, is rarely the answer to healthy living. Irrespective of the kind of relationship people have with their mothers, it is one of the most profound bonds in an individual’s life.

Hence, the mother’s death is bound to evoke powerful emotions in a person. While people tend to run away from such feelings, rather than facing them, the ability to mourn or grieve a loss is a reflection of one’s ability to love. 

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Ideally, sharing feelings with those close to a person is helpful. If individuals have siblings, they’d be the first choice, since they share a bond with the mother figure as well. 

Avoid triggers which may cause pain 

Trigger warnings are common disclaimers in today’s world but individuals often trigger themselves with their actions. On a day of missing a mother who’s died, it is best to stay away from gifts and cards pertaining to Mother’s Day, not visit restaurants during celebratory times, and avoid scrolling through social media to see posts of happy families. 

Make specific plans 

Having a set plan in place gives purpose to a day that’d otherwise be spent grieving over someone who’s departed. The key is self-compassion and self-care. 

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It is best to do something that’ll take the mind off this loss and keep an individual engaged. Having backup plans involving people is also great, in case one doesn’t want to spend the day alone. 

Honour their memory 

While individuals are bound to feel the loss stemming from their mother’s death, it is a good idea to honour their memory or do something good on Mother’s Day. This can include contributing to a charity and getting together with the family to share stories and keep the person alive in memories. 

New traditions and turning a page 

While Mother’s Day traditions might have been a go-to way to celebrate the occasion, the death of the mother can leave a void. This is best filled with new traditions to take an individual’s mind off the loss.