Texas shooting: Grief and remembrance in ‘If Anything Happens I Love You’

The Robb Elementary School shooting at Uvalde, Texas, left 19 children and two teachers dead, before the alleged 18-year-old gunman, Salvador Ramos was killed by a special border patrol agent. 

Reacting to the massacre, which brought back memories of Sandy Hook, for many, the parents of the victims remembered losing their loved ones, trying to process the grief, and urging for societal changes. 

“Why”, asked Angel Garza, father of 10-year-old Amerie Jo, who died in the shootout. In another post, he said, “Ohhh my sweet baby I love you so much. I will never be happy or complete again”. 

Another parent, Felicha Martinez spoke to the Washington Post about losing her son, Xavier in the incident, saying “He was funny, never serious, and his smile, that smile I will never forget.” 

Also Read | What is the Charleston loophole in US gun laws?

As parents grapple with the personal tragedy, the issues of gun violence in America and the danger to school students have once again become a topic of discussion. 

Dr César A. Cruz, who now works in the Harvard University administration is credited with saying “Art should comfort the disturbed and disturb the comfortable”, which brings us to the 2020 Oscar-winning animated Netflix short film ‘If Anything Happens I Love You’. 

In 12 minutes, the movie packs a gamut of emotions, as we see two parents coping with grief. Soon, viewers understand that they’ve lost their daughter and are haunted by her memories. It is only towards the end of the film that the circumstances of her death become clear – she is a victim of a school shooting. 

Also Read | How to help the families of mass shooting victims?

The film skirts the graphic violence, instead, allowing viewers to hear sounds of screams and gunfire behind closed doors, as the daughter texts the film’s title as the last message to her parents. 

Eventually, the parents realize that their memories of her are what’ll bring them together and help them move on from the tragedy. 

The movie doesn’t focus on a specific school shooting, and it doesn’t need to. The US has seen so many fatal incidents over the past few years, that the general setting of ‘If Anything Happens I Love You’ allows the film to capture the grief and loss that follows a school shooting, and the profound impact such an incident leaves on parents’ lives. 

“Mommy needs you, Amerie I can’t do this life without you. How am I supposed to live life without you? I will never understand. I love you and I’ll never be the same, ever again”, Kimberly Garcia, Amerie Jo’s mother, had written on Facebook. 

Also Read | Sandy Hook to Uvalde: On gun laws, the US cannot come together

Will McCormack the co-director and writer of the movie, said during his Oscar acceptance speech that the film was dedicated to all those who’d lost loved ones in gun violence. “We deserve better than to live in a country where more than 100 people die by gun violence every single day. We deserve better. We must do better. We will do better”, McCormack had said. 

Grief is processed in different ways by different people, and the movie shows how the parents drift apart while trying to deal with their daughter’s death. A flashback montage shows a life that was, and once she walks into the school, viewers realize she’ll never walk out. 

Speaking to Deadline about the authenticity of the short movie, McCormack explained they’d met with parents who lost their kids to gun violence. “When your parents die, you bury them in the ground. But when your child dies, you bury them in your heart”, he spoke of the core idea of the film, which became a guiding star. 

Co-director Michael Govier said, “Too often, [deaths to gun violence] just become a number. Behind every one of those numbers, there’s a soul lost and someone who’s no longer here. I think that’s why we wanted to discuss just one person’s story so we could bring people together to have a conversation through understanding that these aren’t just numbers. These are people, these are humans.” 

Also Read | Ballots and bullets: What Texas elections looked like after Uvalde school shooting

“All I can hope is that she’s just not a number. This is enough. No one else needs to go through this. We never needed to go through this, but we are”, said Felix Rubio of the Uvalde County Sheriff’s Office, echoing the same sentiment. His daughter Lexi died at the Uvalde shooting. 

The Robb Elementary School shooting has sparked a debate about gun regulation in the nation again, while Texas’ own lax gun laws have become a matter of focus. The Uvalde incident comes on the heels of the May 14 shooting at Buffalo, which was a racially motivated crime. Irrespective of one’s stand on the matter, gun violence has become a part of everyday life in the US, with those like New York Mayor Eric Adams attempting to draw up a blueprint to combat the issue. The incident at Uvalde also prompted actor Matthew McConaughey to speak up about the incident in his hometown. In his statement, the Hollywood star referred to gun violence as an epidemic that could be fought. 

In all such shootings, the discussion inevitably shifts to the shooter, decoding their motives. In the Uvalde incident, there are already narratives about Ramos being an illegal immigrant in the US, Associated Press reported. However, the news cycle moves away from the parents and a depiction of loss from their perspective, as per Govier. Speaking to Salon, he said, “We wanted to focus on what the parents look like, and what that life looks like, and what that grief and loss looks like. Those people are still there.” 

Also Read | Timeline of how alleged Texas school shooter purchased his guns, ammunition

At the same time, Govier made it evident that gun violence has now become a larger part of everyday American life than it was when he was growing up.

“We are older, and we grew up without active shooter drills. A lot of our animators are young, and we talked about that, and they experienced [active shooter drills] and said, ‘Yes, this is what you do.’ We are in shock that this is a way of life you have to participate in”, he said. 

Co-director McCormack agreed, saying, “Gun violence is not indiscriminate. It’s not someone else’s problem, it’s everyone’s problem. It happens in schools, it happens in grocery stores, it happens everywhere.”