With the entire country going through pandemic and isolation seemed to have increased the chances of depression and suicidal thoughts, it becomes all the more important to stay in touch with those who needs you the most, says Dr. Dain Heer, who is a  bestselling author, renowned speaker and the co-creator of Access Consciousness, a personal development modality practiced in 173 countries.

It’s important to “call someone”, he says.

“Call a suicide hotline, ask for help – they have them in every country in the world. That is first. The second I would say is Access Consciousness Bars- This literally saved my life!  It is a relaxation technique that healed me from depression twenty years ago and changes your brain waves to such a degree that it can diminish depression, stress and anxiety at an average of 87 percent with one session,” he told Opoyi.

Heer, who wrote 17 books on embodiment, healing, money and relationships and his latest book, ‘A Drop In The Ocean’ was published in March 2020, says that “what we need to understand is that 98% person of your thoughts, feelings and emotions, including your suicidal thoughts, feelings and emotions, are not necessarily yours.”

 “So you want to ask “who does this belong to? Is this mine?”…this is another way I healed myself from depression twenty years ago, by asking ‘who does this belong to, is this mine?’ And if that lightens you up at all, it is not yours, return it to whoever it came from. And you may not even know the person. And let’s face it, the world has changed dynamically, and one of the things people hate the most is change and one of the things they fear the most is change. If they would embrace the change rather than fearing it, their own personal level of depression would go down,” he said.

Talking about the changes that people with depression start encountering, he said, “Watch for any changes to someone’s normal demeanour , this can signal that they may be facing inner turmoil.  One sign is withdrawal from you and things they normally do. Showing up late for work when they don’t normally, their productivity may be going down and also their energy levels are low. And their levels of joy seems to be non-existence.”

He also says that it’s important to ask them questions and see what’s going on in their world.

“Engage them in a conversation, one of the reasons people get into depression is that they feel isolated. Let them know they are not alone. Talk to them, ask them questions: What is going on? How are you? Are you okay? What can I contribute to you? As far as supporting them, if they open up, let them know you’re there and will listen with a non-judgmental ear,” he said.

He also suggests that one should stop judging themselves.

“We spend so much time judging ourselves and our bodies, and we are so used to believing that we are wrong. Would you be willing to let that go? Would you be willing to consider that you’re not nearly as messed up as you’ve decided you are? Try asking this question every day, “What’s right about me that I’m not getting?”

“Start by recognising that there is nothing wrong with you. Ask questions. Stop taking on other people’s stuff. Choose these things daily and a whole new world will begin to open up for you,” he said.

Dain feels that the pandemic has given an indication of the possibilities for the future that could be available. 

“A lot of people have had their comfortable existence turned upside down, so they have had to question more. One of the things that will introduce more possibilities into someone’s life is actually asking a question. A question always opens up another doorway of possibility, whereas an answer always leaves you stuck,” said the renowned author.

When it comes to relationships and life, one will have more gratitude and more of a sense of connection with others that “we may have taken for granted before”.

“Now, during the pandemic, many times people will actually say hello when they’re out walking on the street, getting out of the house for their daily exercise. We’ve created a place where people actually talk to each other, which they haven’t done for years, because we have this shared experience, this common experience of this pandemic which has brought people together and shown us that we are not nearly as separate as we had been pretending to be,” he concluded.